It's A Wonderful Life

End of last part:

CLARENCE: Help! Help, I'm drowning! Oh! Help!

WILLIAM KEIGHLEY: No, that's not George. It's Clarence, the apprentice angel. And there goes George into the river to save him. Hmmm. Now, it's a few minutes later and, in the small place where the bridgekeeper stays, George and Clarence are getting dry.

Act 3 - Part 1

BRIDGEKEEPER: You both sure you're all right? You want a doctor?

GEORGE: No, I'm all right, I'm all right.

CLARENCE: Oh, I'm fine. This underwear-- I didn't have time to get anything more stylish. My wife gave me this on my last birthday. I passed away in it.

BRIDGEKEEPER: You - you what, mister?

CLARENCE: Oh, I see Tom Sawyer's drying out, too.

BRIDGEKEEPER: Who?

CLARENCE: My book. I left in such a hurry, I brought Tom Sawyer with me.

GEORGE: Hey, how did you happen to fall in the river?

CLARENCE: Oh, I jumped in . I jumped in to save you.

GEORGE: Jumped in to save me?

CLARENCE: Well, I - I did, didn't I? You didn't do it, did you?

GEORGE: Do what?

CLARENCE: Kill yourself.

BRIDGEKEEPER: Hey, it's against the law to commit suicide around here!

CLARENCE: Yeah, it's against the law where I come from, too.

BRIDGEKEEPER: Where do you come from?

CLARENCE: Heaven.

GEORGE: Oh, that's very funny, very funny.

CLARENCE: Your - your lip's bleeding.

GEORGE: Yeah. Yeah, I was hit in the jaw in answer to a prayer.

CLARENCE: Oh, no, George. I'm the answer to your prayer.

GEORGE: Hey, how - how'd you know my name?

CLARENCE: Oh, I know all about you.

GEORGE: Well, who are you supposed to be, anyway?

CLARENCE: Clarence Oddbody, A-S-2.

GEORGE: Clarence Oddbody. What's - what's the A-S-2 mean?

CLARENCE: Angel, Second Class.

GEORGE: Hey, look here, why did you want to save me?

CLARENCE: Because I'm your guardian angel, George.

GEORGE: Oh, I see, uh huh. Well, you look like about the kind of an angel I'd get. What - what, uh, what happened to your wings?

CLARENCE: I haven't won my wings yet. That's why I'm an Angel, Second Class.

GEORGE: Oh, I see.

CLARENCE: But you can help me earn them, George, by letting me help you.

GEORGE: Oh, uh huh. You don't happen to have eight thousand bucks on you, do you?

CLARENCE: Oh, no, no. We - we don't use money in Heaven.

GEORGE: Oh, that's right, yeah, I keep forgetting. I see. It comes in pretty useful down here, friend. Of course, I found that out a little late. You know, I'm worth more dead than alive!

CLARENCE: You mustn't talk like. Joseph will never give me my wings if you keep feeling that way. You just don't realize what you've done for your folks. Why, without you--

GEORGE: Yeah, without me, everybody would be better off! My wife, and my kids and my friends--

CLARENCE: Ohhhh, this is not going to be easy.

GEORGE: They'd all be better off if I hadn't been born.

CLARENCE: What did you say?

GEORGE: I said, I wish I'd never been born!

CLARENCE: George, that's wonderful.

GEORGE: Wonderful? What?

CLARENCE: The idea you just gave me. Well, you've got your wish. You've never been born.

GEORGE: I've never been born?

CLARENCE: Exactly. No worries, no eight thousand dollars to get, nothing. You simply don't exist.

GEORGE: All right, all right, okay, all right.

CLARENCE: George, I can do things. Strange things. I can show you the world, George, the way it would be if you hadn't been born.

GEORGE: Hey, wait. Say, wait a minute! This ear of mine. Say something else in that bad ear.

CLARENCE: You don't have a bad ear any more. Oh, I don't think you're paying attention. Don't you see? You're not the George Bailey you think you are. You're-- Well, uh, you're nobody.

GEORGE: Well, that's the strangest thing I ever-- that - that ear--

CLARENCE: Your lip's stopped bleeding, too.

GEORGE: Yeah, yeah... Hey, what's - what's happening around here? What is this, anyway? I need a drink, that's what I need! What about you, angel, you want a drink?

CLARENCE: Well, I - I don't quite know.

GEORGE: C'mon , c'mon, we'll go as soon as our clothes are dry.

CLARENCE: Our clothes ARE dry, George.

GEORGE: Hey, so they are, that's funny. Well, look, let's get dressed and we'll walk over to Martini's and then-- Oh, oh, excuse me, I mean, I'll walk, you'll fly.

CLARENCE: Ha, ha, ha. No, I don't have my wings.

GEORGE: You don't have your wings yet. That's right, I forgot that again. Couple of drinks and we'll both fly, huh?

[SOUND: BAR SOUNDS ... MUSIC IN THE BACKGROUND]

NICK: What'll you have?

GEORGE: Hey, where's the boss? Where's Martini?

NICK: Look, man, I'm the boss, understand?

GEORGE: Okay. Well, I'd like a double whiskey.

NICK: And what do you want?

CLARENCE: You know what I'd just love? Some mulled wine.

NICK: Huh?

CLARENCE: And make it with a lot cinnamon and only a little bit of cloves. Go on now, and hurry up!

NICK: Now, stop that!

GEORGE: (to Nick) Oh, never mind. Just give him the same as I ordered. He's okay.

NICK: Ehh. Two double whiskeys.

GEORGE: (to Clarence) Look at this place! It's all changed.

CLARENCE: All of Bedford Falls has changed. You're having your wish, George. You've never been born. Oh, there'll be lots of things you've never seen before.

[SOUND: CASH REGISTER BELL RINGS]

CLARENCE: Oh, oh! Somebody's just made it.

GEORGE: Made what?

CLARENCE: Every time you hear a bell ring, it means some angel's just got his wings.

[NICK GLARES AT GEORGE AND CLARENCE]

GEORGE: Look, uh... I think maybe you better not mention getting your wings around here.

CLARENCE: Why? Don't they believe in angels?

GEORGE: I... yeah, they believe in them ....

CLARENCE: Ohhh ... Why should they be surprised when they see one?

GEORGE: [TO NICK] Uh, he never grew up. He's... uh...

GEORGE: How old are you, anyway, Clarence?

CLARENCE: Two hundred and ninety-three ... uh ... next May.

GEORGE: Where's Martini? Will you call him--?

NICK: Stop asking about Martini! He isn't here and he--

[A man enters the bar]

NICK: Hey, you! You! Didn't I tell you never to come around here?!

CLARENCE: Oh, George, look!